Deciding to end a marriage
Divorce Quotes (870 quotes)
Making the Decision to End Your Marriage
If you're thinking about ending your marriage, you're likely facing one of the most difficult decisions of your adult life. Many partners struggle for a very long time before making a firm choice about whether to stay or go. If you are agonizing over the decision of whether or not to file for divorce , there are steps you can take in this process. For many couples, the amount of time they've already invested in their marriages has a lot to do with their decision to stay or to go. It's generally easier for a younger married couple to divorce and start their lives over again than it is for partners who've been together a decade or more.
Getting married ranks high when it comes to the happiest days of a person's life. A wedding day , after all, is usually a joyous celebration and, one hopes, an indicator of what's to come. But sometimes fairy tales don't always end up like you imagined. After months of never-ending fights or failed sessions with a marriage counselor , finding the spark again seems almost impossible. A number of things can weave a path straight to divorce : not putting in the effort to compromise, shutting down emotionally, pushing your partner away, and even seeking intimacy from an outside partner.
Getting a divorce
Making the decision to leave a marriage is scary: There's often a deep fear of being alone, not to mention the possibility of an unknown future. So many stick with mediocrity, settling for low-level pain and dissatisfaction instead. But that's not your best bet: "Staying in a seriously unhappy marriage can have long-term effects on our mental and emotional health," says Carrie Cole, a couples therapist and Master Certified Gottman Therapist by the Gottman Institute. Research shows that people in bad marriages usually have low self-esteem, struggle with anxiety and depression, and have a higher rate of illness than those who don't. People feel sad and grieve when they decide to let go — but people who divorce do recover emotionally, and Cole says most find new relationships. In fact, "one statistic reported that 85 percent of those who divorce remarry within five years," she says. If any these signs hit home for you, it's time to take a hard look at whether this is a marriage you want to stay in.