Infidelity in relationships and marriage
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Relationship Advice : How to Fix Your Marriage After You Had an Affair
Can Your Marriage Survive Infidelity?
Love and intimacy are at the core of humanity. The need for each is hardwired in all of us — dreamers, doers, madmen and the perfectly sane. But love and intimacy can also bring us to our knees, leading us into breathtaking emptiness, sadness and despair. Without a doubt, one of the worst parts of love, perhaps one of the worst parts of being human, is finding that the person we love might be falling in love or in-like-a-lot with somebody else. The are many reasons people stray from the arms of a long-term intimate partner and into the arms of another.
I've spent the last 10 years interviewing strangers in more than 40 countries in order to try and understand love and relationships. One topic that came up more than most was cheating. Infidelity means different things to different people. Some define it as kissing, others sex, and some as a full-blown affair. But what about emotional infidelity? Or cybersex, where people only ever meet via a screen?
There are many reasons why married people cheat.
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An estimated 40 percent of American marriages experience at least one episode of infidelity. Studies show more men than women cheat, but they often do it for the same reasons. While infidelity is a factor in many divorces, half of American marriages survive an extramarital affair. New social science and medical research is contributing to understanding the causes of infidelity. A discussion on what drives people to cheat and how infidelity can affect children and the whole family. Scott Haltzman , a longtime therapist and expert on infidelity and marriage, addresses your questions about relationships, why people cheat and how to rebuild trust after an affair. Some questions have been edited for space and clarity.
Can you spot a husband prone to infidelity? If he's unhappy with his wife, he'll cheat, right? Not necessarily. They're largely satisfied with all they have and aren't looking for a way out, yet they still find themselves in bed with other women—and in hot water with their wives. Here, experts explain this phenomenon and dispel other popular cheating myths.
The topic of infidelity and cheating spouses is everywhere. We hear about it frequently in the media and have seen the marriages of friends or relatives that have been devastated by affairs. It's no surprise that many couples internally ask the question, "How would I cope? It's particularly common to also wonder if your own marriage could survive such a serious betrayal. Popular psychologist and self-help book author, Dr. Harriet Lerner writes about this in a PsychologyToday. She writes,.