Alvin and the chipmunks chipwrecked summary
Alvin and the Chipmunks, Chipwrecked: Meet the Chipettes by AnonymousThis is the worst piece of garbage Ive ever had the misfortune of existing in the same universe as.
Ok, lets be fair. My little cousin got this thing for free with a Nathans hot dogs kids meal. Under normal circumstances that would exempt such a thing from a book review. But this thing has an ISBN number. Nobody gets to use 978-16114051640 because these disgusting computer generated chimps have got it nailed down. Its official. It might even end up in the Library of Congress. That makes it fair game.
Lets start by possibly violating copyright law and just transcribing the entire book for you:
Were the world famous chipettes! Im Brittany, the sassy lead singer! My name is Jeanette! Im really smart, just a little clumsy. Im Elanor. I can do anything that I put my mind to! Were the coolest bunch of munks around!
Thats it. I dont feel that it is necessary to rip this apart, but I feel the strong desire to.
Setting- 0/10: There isnt any. Unless this takes place in some free floating realm consisting entirely of lazily rendered geometric pattern backgrounds (which would actually make it 9000% more interesting.)
Plot- 0/10: There isnt any. Its just freakish chimps giving a one line summary of their personalities.
Character Development- 1/10: Well, each character does give one line about themselves. Is it so bad that they slide immediately into such boring tropes as the Outgoing Leader, the Smart but Ugly One, and the Determined Idiot? Not if Im being generous. But Im not being generous. These tropes are transparent, uninteresting, and their perpetuation fosters the collapse of our society.
To reiterate, This book marks the nadir of Western Civilization. It is the ugliest, most vapid piece of trash Ive ever seen published in any country. And--- If we cut the bullshit for a second, its an obvious advertisement for the new Chipmunks movie. I mean, the most common punctuation mark is an exclamation point. Nothing happens except the main characters of the movie telling you how cool they are, right next to images of their terrifying, impossibly large heads. They could have written an actual, stimulating short story about the Chipettes finding their stolen guitar or something. Instead they give us a foldable billboard. Its only disguised as a book to slip by the mental defenses of the parents. Let little Amanda read this book. Itll help her learn and one day shell be reading Ernest Hemmingway.
Bullshit. One day shell be watching The Chipettes 7 in the irradiated, rust stained ruins of what was once New York. Lets be honest. We all knew from the beginning that the Chipmunks were an autoimmune disease of American society. A cultural AIDS virus if you will. It inverted our tendency towards producing culture in the form of music, into producing squeals and squeaks which are neither cute nor artful. Now they are employing the same corrosion on film and literature.
Next time you hear a Chipette squeak, recognize it for what it is. The sound of the last feeble strands of air rushing out from the increasingly flat tire that is The West.
Alvin and the Chipmunks - Chipwrecked - Official Trailer HD
Alvin and the Chipmunks: ChipWrecked
Show co-creator rummaging around in a Dumpster, playing a disgraced record executive who pays dearly for trying to exploit the Chipmunks. It is not a role overly conducive to the preservation of dignity or self-respect. Then again, what in Chipwrecked is? Sporting a default look of weary resignation, Jason Lee returns as the caretaker of rodent superstars Alvin And The Chipmunks and their distaff counterparts, The Chipettes. Chipwrecked finds Lee escorting the Chipmunks and Chipettes to an international awards show via a luxury cruise ship, but before the gala event can occur, the musical rodents with the unbearably squeaky voices are ship-wrecked on a remote island with only a mysterious castaway the charmingly daft Jenny Slate for company. It all but apologizes for its ridiculous, mercenary existence with a running time well under 90 minutes and rapid-fire pacing that hurries the little ones out the door as quickly as possible, so they can get on with their day.
On Dvd & Streaming
Plugged In exists to shine a light on the world of popular entertainment while giving you and your family the essential tools you need to understand, navigate and impact the culture in which we live. Through reviews, articles and discussions, we want to spark intellectual thought, spiritual growth and a desire to follow the command of Colossians "See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. - They take a love-boat like cruise in the areas of the Hawaiian islands accompanied by the Chippettes - Brittany with the voice of Christina Applegate, Eleanor with the voice of Amy Poehler and Jeanette with the voice of Anna Faris. Click here to see the rest of this review.
The film is a follow-up to Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel The film premiered on December 16, in the United States. Playing around while aboard a cruise ship, The Chipmunks and The Chipettes accidentally go overboard and end up marooned in a tropical paradise. They discover their new turf is not as deserted as it seems. Alvin and Simon were grabbed by Dave Theodore is watching Jungle Monster 4 when they are caught in the casino.
Dave , The Chipmunks , and The Chipettes go on a vacation on a cruise ship. The Chipmunks and the Chipettes, especially Alvin, end up creating pandemonium. Later that night, after Dave leaves to eat at the captain's table and apologize for Alvin's behavior, Alvin sneaks out to the ship's casino, followed by Simon, who hopes to keep Alvin out of further exposure; meanwhile the Chipettes go to the ship's dance club, leaving Theodore alone in the room, watching an unsuitable monster movie. Dave discovers that his old boss, Ian Hawke , is working as the ship's safety monitor dressed as a pelican, and is out to inform the captain if the Chipmunks and Chipettes cause more problems. Simon and Alvin are eventually caught in the casino, and are brought back to the room, along with the Chipettes, and all are accused by Dave for not being trustworthy. The next day, Alvin goes para-sailing on a kite, but the kite flies away with him and the other Chipmunks.