He used me for years

9.82  ·  4,160 ratings  ·  981 reviews
he used me for years

The Girl He Used to Know by Tracey Garvis Graves

Clearly this is a testament to how shallow I am because Ive never been tempted by this authors books before when the covers featured photographs of women staring at the horizon, but give me an arty hipster cover and Im all for it. It was a mistake, obviously.

I could tell you that this book bored me, that the characters had no chemistry, that it was all telling and no showing, that the writing was robotic (even in Jonathans chapters so, no, this cant be attributed to Annika being autistic), and all of that would be true. But it is not what bothered me most.

By far the most irritating aspect of The Girl He Used to Know is the way the author handled some of the themes. I wont spoil the ending, but that whole drama that flew in at the last minute seemed unnecessary and a bit tasteless, honestly - (view spoiler)[of course Jonathan was in the South Tower on 9/11 🙄 (hide spoiler)]. And it really bothered me the way Jonathan infantilizes Annika and turns her into something of a manic pixie dream girl during his perspectives. He describes her as childlike and delicate and patronizes her with comments about how she was “wonderful tonight” after she passes for neurotypical at a social event.

The author says she did extensive research into autism, but doesnt personally know anyone on the autism spectrum. I think that came across here.

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Published 25.02.2019

He Doesn't Want You, He Wants HELP!

He used me for sex

My passion is writing about love, sex, dating, and relationships. I write based on my own personal experiences and those that I relate to. When a guy strings you along—casually keeping you in his life, until he decides what he wants, it's generally because he already knows what he doesn't want—you. Let me rephrase that, he does want you for some selfish reason in his life—casual sex, companionship or maybe until someone else better comes along. Either way, it's because he does not see a future or a lasting future with you. It's doesn't matter if you have been together for two months or six years—a guy will string you along as long as he can and as long as you will let him for his own benefit, which serves no one, but himself. When a guy starts to string you along, it can be natural to want to believe and hope that he's not, and if he is—it's only temporary, until he realizes how fabulous you really are.

I didn't wait 10 months to get over my last breakup just to have sex with some guy who lied straight to my face for weeks. You knew I was vulnerable. I didn't even want to be dating at the time, but you messaged me on OkCupid and I thought you were pretty cute. You even read my blog and told me how my unique experiences and outlook on love made me different. I would joke around how I was "exactly like other girls," but you shut that down.

Subscribe To Our Newsletter! There are many possible reasons why a guy might use a woman. He might use her for intimacy and not want to actually commit to her. Or maybe he is just after your money and he likes that you are generous. These are just a few reasons why a guy might use someone. That being said, this does not mean that every guy out there is a user.

They exploit what they perceive as a vulnerability in order to gain an advantage.
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Reader Interactions

Remember Me? Buzz Articles Advanced Search. Results 1 to 6 of 6. Thread: He used me He used me We lived together half that time. I've always loved him with all my heart, but he has always lied to me and treated me badly.

Anonymous in Your Story on 14 August, Report this story. Submit Cancel. I was young when I met him. I always wanted a fairy tale in my life where a guy loves me more than anything in the world, but I was never so lucky with it. We met in college and became friends for a couple of years. After college, we continued meeting outside.

I've known this man since , but only started to see him romantically in October. Things were going well, and I thought he was a really nice guy. We met up a few times, but he only ever took me to hotels, and he was always late when meeting up. After about our third date, I had sex with him, and then it just became a more frequent thing. He was normal for a bit, but began to ignore me. No replies for hours upon end, and excuses like "I've been busy. At first he was hesitant, but then he just agreed.


  1. Larry H. says:

    May 13, I dated a guy for 5 years. We lived together half that time. I've always loved him with all my heart, but he has always lied to me and treated me.

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